Wax On, Wax Off

 Some of us are old enough to remember that infamous line from the “Karate Kid.”  This was the task of wiping on polish in a circular motion with one hand, and wiping it off with the other, training for a karate hand block.   Of course, it was also good muscle conditioning – and - the car got polished to a high sheen.

I thought about this as I was waving around some weights this morning in the gym.   My car sits in the driveway in desperate need of a polish, and there I was performing the same action to no practical outcome.  I go to a spin cycle class and then drive to the grocery store.  I walk to school for exercise, and then take the elevator 3 floors.   Need I go on? 

The absurdity continues on a more detailed level.   For example, take the electric beater for eggs. Karate kid replacement:  a wire whisk.  I’ve found that if you put the eggs in a cup that is just the right diameter as the whisk, you can just swirl it by putting your hands together around the handle and rubbing your hands back and forth.   The eggs whip up in no time,  this is a great exercise for abs and upper arms – AND – you are mastering the skills needed to start a fire using the friction method , should the need arise ( See Tom Brown’s Field Guide to Survival).  It seems that using an egg beater is a waste of “electrical” power over the option of “muscle” power.

It happens in a bigger system loop as well.   We use a leaf blower to get the fall leaves off our yards and  onto the street, sometimes even with the extra effort of bagging them,  so that the city trucks can pick them up, transport them to a central location, unbag them, and set up a compost.  In the spring, you drive to a store – or the city dump, buy compost and bring it right back to your yard.   Oh – and you’ve been to the gym in the meantime to work off that extra helping of turkey dressing.   How about the good ole-fashioned and quiet rake and compost pile (I’m tellin’ ya – worms work great). Presto voila – you are more fit –and you have your own home-made garden soil.  Saves on gas, pollution, equipment, noise...

And the newest toy for kids this season?   Play toys on iPads.   Yup that is right.  About one in three Americans kids are considered overweight or obese.  So now they can play HotWheels on their iPads.  I remember playing HotWheels with my brother when I was a kid.  We had a track which threaded through furniture over two rooms.   We would scoot the cars along, climb up and down over chairs.  And now -  well  the kids can start working on an early case of carpal tunnel.  Mind you - I admire the technology  - just not the unintended consequences.

So that is enough pontificating for one day.   Now – about that car…. Wipe on, Wipe off.